Authentic Community

Many Christians are familiar with the phrase "authentic community." The first time I experienced authentic community was on a Summer Project with Campus Crusade for Christ (now Cru).

There were  23 peers of mine, living in one condominium building, eating meals together, working part-time jobs with one another, sharing fears, struggles, hopes, and prayers with each other, and studying God's Word together. It was one of the most satisfying and freeing summers of my life. I learned from the people I was surrounded with and loved them. Back in the real world (non Summer Project) authentic community is a bit harder to find.

There are many different facets of that authentic community that are vital.
Friendship and accountability. As Christians, we need to surround ourselves with other believers who can be an encouragement to us, come alongside us in prayer, and help us grow into more mature disciples of Christ. "And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another..." - Hebrews 10:24-25 
Discipleship. We also need to have more mature believers pouring into us with wisdom and teaching. With this, we will have a model of mature Christianity to follow after and have a safe place to ask questions about the faith we may not ourselves know the answer to. "Be a model of good works, and in your teaching show integrity, dignity, and sound speech that cannot be condemned..." - Titus 2:7 We then also know what to teach others as we grow in our faith.
Transparency. It is important that we experience the "authentic" aspect of community. From my experience, I find that this happens when people are open, honest, and vulnerable with sin/struggles in their lives. "Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed..." - James 5:17 Having this type of connection and bond with others, allows us to ask for help when seeking the Lord and aiming to walk in the light.
Christ-like attitude and humility. One of the more challenging aspects of this authentic community, is to "...have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind." - 1 Peter 3:8 Living closely with others takes a great deal of selflessness and love - which can only be obtained from the Lord.

This is where I may find some opposition.... I do not think we EVER grow out of our need for this. Sure, it may look different with changing seasons of life, but I absolutely see where God desires this for us, in His Word. As believers, young or old, leader or follower, I believe we all need to be experiencing authentic community through discipleship, accountability, and living life together.

Do you know this authentic community? How can you take a step to get closer to saturating yourself in community with believers?


"Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will life ip his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up!" - Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

Take the Initiative

As I've already shared, I don't always come across friendship all that easily. To help grow from a self-wallowing, pouting, pity party thrower into a socially developed person with flourishing friendships, I have decided to take the initiative! Taking the initiative is not always easy - what if your idea is shot down? what if people say no? These are my fears in being the one to take the initiative, but someone has to, right?!

But I don't just want to be the one to suggest a get together or invite someone to an event. I long for more than that. I desire meaningful friendship, community with people who love and care for one another. Unfortunately, all the initiation in the world doesn't promise cultivating that type of relationship. And since being out of college, I have found that authentic community is hard to come by. I want people to ask me deep, heart, "get-to-know-the-real-me" questions and I want to know people in the same way!

That's where I'm stuck. There is no formula to develop these friendships, no set of appropriate questions that lead to especially meaningful conversation... but oh how I wish there was! My generation seems to be stuck in the "this will do until something better comes along" mentality (hence the "maybe" button on Facebook invites!). Whatever happened to bloom where you're planted and seize the day? I don't see many people diving head first into relationships that will foster growth and community. Are we as a culture too guarded? Are we afraid of commitment? Is it our pride that leads us to build walls that don't allow people to see us for who we really are? What is the hold up? We, myself included, are missing out on the community we need -- the type of community that God designed for us! What is holding you back from being the one to take the initiative, to ask the hard questions, or maybe to answer the heart level questions? What is keeping you from knowing people, and being known?

Take the initiative, be real, love people.

"Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God..." - 1 John 4:7

Friendship

My husband, Tyler, often goes out for "guys nights" or has Saturdays full of flag football. But me, I struggle to get time with friends (mostly because so many of my friends are now not local to me) and so friendship has been on my heart recently. We were all created for relationship, with God and each other. But friendships have not always come easy for me. Growing up, my friends were those who enjoyed the same activities as me, laughed when I laughed, slipped me notes in class, or happened to be involved in my seasonal sport or activity. Some friends have stuck with me through the highs and the lows, while others bailed as soon as things got tough. I remember in high school, I was battling depression. A friend of mine, who I had been very close to since elementary school, told me that I cried too much and she no longer wanted to be my friend. Whew! Talk about tough times in teenage years! So, as I have seen in my life, some friends come and some go.

It was not until I met my friend Nicole that I realized the true meaning of friendship. Two verses from the Bible stick out to me when I think of my friendship with Nicole. "A friend loves at all times." - Proverbs 17:17 and "As iron sharpens iron, one man sharpens another." -Proverbs 27:17. Nicole and I met in high school- we had  Marine Biology the same period and we were both cheerleaders. Once we became friends, there was no way out. And this was new to me. Shortly after we became friends, I placed my faith in Christ and became a Christian! So the whole, friendship with Jesus involved thing was really new for me. She showed me love and faithfulness unlike any friend I had ever had... because she had a personal relationship with God. There was a season (right after high school and into college) that I distanced myself from Nicole. I ran from her friendship.... because she had a close relationship with God.... and I wanted to also distance myself from Him in order to attempt satisfying my desires my way rather than His way. You are probably thinking, "what a jerk you were!" and "poor Nicole!" And rightly so! She stuck by me through prayer, love, and encouragement even when I had turned my back on her and our God. She welcomed me back into a close friendship with no conditions, just love.... 4 years ago this Thanksgiving.

Nicole has taught me so much about friendship. And in the last 4 years, we have been able to grow in the Lord together, encourage one another, support each other, and stand up as MOH's at each other's weddings! I am so thankful that God brought a friend like Nicole into my life to teach me what it means to be a friend. It is not about laughing at the same things, enjoying the same activities, or passing notes (or these days texts) in class. But it is about love, encouragement, and most of all, Jesus. I cherish my friendship with the few close friends that I have, because I know, they are founded on the Lord and they will last!

"But exhort one another every day, as long as it is called "today," that none of you may be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin." - Hebrews 3:13